Day 9

Daily Practice
2 hours
I went to Bettina's Vocal Tech and Vocal Performance class.  I practiced my song a little before class, and practiced some other songs for a while after class.   I'm going on an audition this weekend which has asked for us to prepare a Broadway or a Pop/Rock song that will be sung a cappella.  I've chosen "Someone Like You" for my Broadway song, and I still need to figure out a Pop/Rock song in case they ask to hear something a little more upbeat.

Side note: I've been singing so much, and I feel like I'm using the right placement-- I'm not grabbing for notes, etc., but my throat hurts.  Gotta figure out what I'm doing wrong or what I need to do for recovery each day.  I remember when I was younger hearing that Celine Dion didn't talk around her house; she used sign language to communicate with her husband because she wanted to keep her voice healthy.  At the time I thought she was a little crazy... well let's be honest she is a little crazy... but I guess that's what makes her so great.  So I've decided that I really want to take this training seriously, and model myself after the best of the best, so I'm not going to talk for the rest of this 30- day challenge.  I'm carrying around a notebook that I will use for any communication that I need to have throughout the day, and I'm going to use email and text instead of the phone for friends and family that are away.  It seems extreme, but it's only for about 20 more days, and I want to go all-in with my training.

Healthy Meal 17

Breakfast: Oatmeal
Lunch: Leafy green salad with 1/2 of a cilantro-flavored chicken breast + red Gala apple
Dinner: Ham, turkey, cheese sandwich + raspberry yogurt + sketchy banana (see FB status)






Dance Class 5

I started the week off right with Goheen's 10:30am ballet class.  And best case: I was accompanied by my roommate!  Meet Jessica Chen!  I found my apartment on Craigslist, and when I moved in Jessica was in China performing.  She just moved back about two months ago, and it turns out that she used to take dance from Beth Goheen at Alvin Ailey and Broadway Dance Center.  It was fun to finally have my day-to-day life collide with my dancing life: we got up, ate breakfast, and walked to class together.  I felt like I was in Center Stage-- leaving our dorm and heading to the studio.

More importantly, though, Jessica has started her own dance company!  Take a look at her website and see the cool stuff she's been working on: J Chen Project.  It's so fascinating to be her roommate and see the behind-the-scenes of a legit entrepreneurial artist. 

Back to me.  Ballet was great.  It was a small class, so everyone got a lot of individual attention.  I'm so excited about my growth in that class.  I used to be a hot mess in there-- flailing around, lost and frustrated.  But now, Goheen has been calling me to come with the first group to go across the floor or to switch with someone so that I'm more downstage for our center work.  To an outsider, it probably seems like a small thing, but fellow dancers, I'm sure you understand-- we work our butts off for that type of recognition in class.

The note that stuck with me the most today was to elongate everything.  Elongating in your neck, across your back, through your finger tips, in your toes, etc. From barre to center work, elongating is what can make the difference between a well-trained technical dancer and a performer.  I want to be in the latter group.

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By the way, I was totally kidding about that not-talking thing; hope you read this far.

Anyways, today's life lesson took place in Vocal Performance class.  I thought I was ready to go-- I had been practicing all week, moreso than I had practiced any other song I had sang in there.  I also thought that since it was now my 6th time attending that class, I would finally be over the nerves.  Wrong.  I couldn't stop shaking, and you could hear it in my voice.  Tears welled up in my eyes when I sat down because I was so disappointed with myself.  To make matters worse, someone else had my song.  And I'm sure you can guess how this story goes: her voice was beautiful, her acting was on-point, and she put me to shame.  I know this all sounds like gloom and doom, but here's the positive ending... it just made me want to work harder.

You see in my books, today's performance was a fail, but that's what I need-- failure.  Failure's a lot like getting a shot.  There's this big build-up, and you soooo don't want to do it, and the needle looks terrifying, but when they actually stick you, it's really not that big of a deal.  And if you only get a shot once every 4 or 5 years, then you go through the same process every time because you allow your mind to psyche you out and you choose to forget that the needle is really not that painful.  But as I've gotten older and I've had to get blood drawn for tests or get immunizations for overseas travel, my brain starts to remember that it's not that bad-- I wince for a second or two right as they hold the needle to my skin, but then I allow logic to take over, and I am able to relax.  Don't get me wrong, I don't want to get used to failure, but I just don't want the fear of it to have such a hold over me that I can't ever perform at my best.  So once my mind starts to accept the fact that failure exists, and that I will experience it throughout my life, and most importantly that it's not lethal, then I can begin to leave my nerves at the door and finally blossom into the performer that I want to be.  So here's to experiencing failure, and getting back up to tell the story!